Football. The End.

We go through this every year.  We can usually get through January just fine, and maybe a couple of weeks in February, but after that the ripples start cutting the surface of the water.

The piranhas are beginning their circle.

It's slow at first.  Small.  I'll start feeling it when I'm walking through the hall at my kids' school.  Then again when we're at the park.  Its even been known to show up at the grocery store.

I dodge it as best I can.  Avoiding eye contact.  Finding something really interesting on the ground to look at.  Pretending to be totally confused by whatever list I happen to have in my hand.

(Let's see.....What's on sale?)
(Uhhhh...was that the white or the dark?)
(How many different types of nails could there be?)
  
But, it doesn't matter.   It never works.  They can smell the blood the minute I enter the building.

It usually starts with some mindless chit chat about crap I don't give a rip about,

(small talk is not my superpower)

and despite my stellar attempts to feign interest, we end up with a lull in the conversation.

Then with a head tilt and a voice lilt the dreaded question rears it's gi-normously wretched PTA-mom head:

So....are your kids playing any sports this spring?

That sound you just heard was my inner core exploding and oozing slowly out of my ears.

The only questions that are more gaggy are

Did you get on the scale today?
How much did you spend?
Where is that thing that I haven't thought about in the last 26 years, but could really use right now?
(because the answer is:  I threw it away last week.)
(Every time.  Every.  Time.)
 
See, here's the thing:

We play football.  The End.

Football is a punch you in the junk, rip out your throat, Every. Freakin'. Day. onslaught of never-ending practice and laundry and bureaucratic garbage that lasts from the beginning of August all the way through to the middle of November.

And it's not just football, either.  It's cheer now, too, with Competition, which, actually, technically, outlasts football.

Eet's niyghts, weeeekendz, hahlidays.

(wait...that might be Kindergarten Cop...)

It's two kids, with two activity schedules, going in two different directions, with 147 pieces of equipment that all has to be hand washed in Moroccan oil and hung to dry over a field of butterflies so it doesn't shrink or pill or wrinkle or melt or fade which would make the coach look so so bad,

for three and half months, which doesn't sound like a long time, but it's really almost 33% of the year.

Imagine not Facebooking for 33% of the year.

Or not driving your car for 33% of the year.

Or not having to hose chicken crap off the back deck because Prince Farming says free ranging is soooo way cool for 33% of the year.

That last one might only apply to me.  I don't know.  It actually doesn't sound too bad, now that I think about it.

My point is 33% of the year is a long time.

And it is all we can do to get through it without being banned from practice for fighting

(Prince Charming)
(bet that coach didn't think you were so charming, huh?)

or ostracized by an 11 year old for critiquing my daughter's sloopy arms

("It's hard to be the base, isn't it?  I know.  You're doing great!")
(You know what!?  Little ponytail...swisher.  I had....a....My team got Superior!  Okay?  Twice.  I know what I'm talking about.)
(And drill is not that different from cheer.)
(except that it is and drill rules all)

or discouraged from taking pictures by the president of the league because he said some parents last year complained even though no one ever said anything to us except, "Wow!  We love those pictures!" and "Be sure to get my kid in there!" and "How can I get a copy of that?"

(It's fine, really.  I'm over it.)

By Thanksgiving we're all on the floor with our tongues hanging out muttering,

"Remember this next year.  Remember this next year."

So, the idea of climbing back on the baseball or soccer or ballet or track or, truly, any spring bandwagon that doesn't involve 3 glasses of wine and a good Netflix line up is really not on our radar.

Although, I usually just shake my head and say something like,

"Oh yeah...no.  We're taking a break this year,"

and then find something really interesting on the ground to look at.

 

Backstage At Competition

It's been  24 years since I've been to any kind of competition.

The pom poms are smaller.

The hair is flouncier.

The moves are scarier.

But the work and prep and intensity and fun and camaraderie are the same.

 

 

Thank you, thank you, thank you for inviting me backstage to capture these moments.

Double L loves you!!!

How Many Pictures Of A Ref's Butt Can You Take?

I've photographed a lot of football games.  And when I say "a lot" I mean close to 46.

As a football momtographer, never, ever, ever, ever, ever have I ever seen a referee so blatantly in the shot as this guy was yesterday.

I know that the refs have to be on the field.  They're there to do a job, and they know you're trying to do one too.  They're usually nice about the pics you're trying to get.

It's always fun when they say cutesy stuff like "Be sure to get my good side."

Or "Do I have to smile for this?"

Or "These stripes don't make me look fat, do they?"

Or, "Pardon my butt."

So clever.

But, this guy? Right in the middle of the damn shot every time.  I mean every.  time.  No matter where I went or what angle I tried to shoot from.

Even when the captains were shaking hands.

Even when it was my son that I couldn't see shaking hands as a captain.

Usually the refs get the play set up and then move to the sideline so the players can run without crashing into them.  This guy was set up almost in line with the players.  I've only seen that done with little, little guys who are like teeny, tiny balls of football fluff that couldn't run over a marshmallow much less a big, burly ref.

This is what it can look like when the refs know where they're supposed to be and get the hell out of the way.

Although, as I said, I do realize that they're there to do a job, and it's far more important than mine,

but, come on....

Maybe I'm just in a bad mood.  I've been looking at a ref's butt all morning.....

Shooting From The Stands

I fell in love with shooting football a few years ago. 

And once you shoot football from the sidelines, it's really anti-climactic to head back up into the stands.  The lens just becomes one giant set of binoculars, truly.  But, I'm learning to love it.

I'm learning.

Sometimes, because you're so far away, you get this distance blur.  And sometimes, when the sun is shining, you get funky sun spots.

 But then again, as they're getting ready to take the field, you're close enough to get a great face.

It is nice to be able to sit back and relax and put my feet up on the bench in front of me and canoodle with my beloved and actually watch the game.

And eat caramel corn and hot dogs.

And not have to run 100 yards 47 times to get the best angle.

Sometimes I move down closer to get a better shot.  Sometimes I don't tell Prince Charming I'm going and then he turns around to smooch me and the woman sitting next to him looks startled and then I laugh.

 

There are great story moments to be told from the stands.

And of course, great cheers.

WHO DAT TALKIN' BOUT BEAT MY KNIGHTS!?

"Yeah, but that's not us anymore."

I know, but we're still all the same family.  WHO DAT? WHO DAT?

"But, that's not our team."

Well, until they go against us, they are.

LET'S GET FIRED UP!  

KNIGHTS PUT YOUR SHIELDS UP!

You Might Be A Football/Cheer Mom If....

You might be a football/cheer mom if...

You send your kids off to do chores by gathering them in front of you and shouting,
"Chores on BREAK!  READDDYYYY!?  BREAK!"
And then everyone claps.

Your 6-year-old daughter can spell OFFENSE, DEFENSE, WHIP IT, SCORE, LET'S GO, ACTION and RED HOT, but has trouble reading the word they.

Sitting on the sidelines, you hear the coach screaming "mmphm blah blah the side mmphm blah!" and your husband sitting next to you elbows you and says,
"YES!  That's EXACTLY what I'd do.  Right down the side like that and then cut over .  EXACTLY!"

A ponytail flounces into your kitchen and orders up a sandwich with peanut butter and

J-A-M, Jam Jam!

J-A-M!

You've got to, got to JAM!

Your kid has 47 pairs of neon yellow socks so you can spot him in an instant from 50 yards away.

You break down every activity into counts of 8.
Water on, 2, 3, 4, and off, 6, 7, 8.

You must forcibly restrain yourself so as not to demonstrate for the cheer coach a little something called

Knights don't mess arouuund, 

They just get down.

Uh-Huh!

Daddy watches his little girl bounce around, so happy and tearful and bursting with pride.
"Isn't she great?  So cute!"
Mommy watches her little girl bounce around and scowls at the spaghetti arms, straight finger clap, and her absolutely unmistakable need to pop it.
"Did she just yawn!?  While she was cheering!?  Oh, we're takin' this dooowwwntown."

You know what a "Punch-Sassy-Sassy-Sassy" is.

You recognize that August 1st through the middle of November is Football Season,
and everything in between is Not Football Season.

Cheer hard!!

The Great KENT KNIGHTS Image Extravaganza {and Giveaway}! (Winner Announced)

And the winner is.....

#3 Coach De La Cruz:  Being a coach, I would say my Kent Knights of course.

Congratulations to the winner!  Please contact lisa@doublelphoto.net to claim your winnings.

Thank you to everyone who threw their helmet into the ring for this giveaway!

Random number generated at www.mathgoodies.com



_________________________________________________________________________


The season is officially over, and it makes me kind of sad because I love football.

But, you know what I love more?

Not having to sit out in the flippin' freezing cold, eating dinner out of a bag, watching practice while my toes, fingers, ears, nose and various other parts of my body slowly turn to ice.

Nope.  Won't miss that.  Not one stinkin' bit.

In fact, knowing that I won't be doing that anymore actually makes me pretty darn happy.  And you know what I do when I get happy?  I start giving stuff away.....

The Great KENT KNIGHTS Image Extravaganza

Here's the deal:

All of the 89ers

All of the Midgets

All of the Bantams 

(okay, the one Bantam, but it would ruin the word flow if I said it that way....)

Released on the website
for viewing and purchase

until

9:00 a.m. on Thursday, November 17th

After that, they're going back in the vault

And because I'm so happy to not be freezing,

And because, as Barry Manilow says, Christmas is just around the corner,

And because I love ya' for all of your kind words and support this past season

There's one more thing....

The Giveaway

The print or CD package of your choice

OR

An 8.5" x 8.5" 12 page, custom soft cover album filled with 

up to 20 of your favorite images of the 2011 season

It looks a little something like this

Yep.  Either one.  Yours.  For free.

I love you that way....

To Enter

The enter the giveaway, just answer the following question in the comments section of this post:

What is your favorite football team?

Are you a Steelers fan?  Do you bleed purple and gold?  Is Roll Tide, not just an expression, but a way of life?  Just shout out your favorite team and you're automatically entered to win.  Just like that....

The Rules

One entry per person

Entries accepted until midnight on Monday, November 14th

Winners will be announced Tuesday morning.

There is just one, teeny, tiny, itty-bitty, little catch.....

All orders, including the giveaway, will be shipped between 

December 7th and 9th

That's it.  See, teeny.  Not a big deal, right?

Okay, then.  Good luck, my friends!

I look forward to hearing from you!!

To view all galleries and images, click here

Project 52 ~ Week 44 {Muted Tones} OR The Last Time I'll Use A Football Pic For This Project, I Promise

Sometimes football is about action. 

Gut pounding, kick you in the crotch, step on your neck action. 

And sometimes, football is about emotion.

Gut pounding, kick you in the crotch, step on your neck emotion. 

This moment of loss wasn't about the action.

And because it's the last time I'll use a football pic for this project,

and because I haven't posted anything in over two weeks,

and becaue I love ya',

here's a few more muted tones football pics that are blowin' my skirt up...

And that's about all I have to say about football for this year.....

Oh!  And one more thing~

I was so inunndated with football last week, that I didn't get a chance to edit or post my picture from Week 43 {Shadows}...so here it is:

Of course, because it's late the Project 52 people won't take it now.  They like it, but they won't take it.

Whatever. 

This is why I'm glad I'm not in school anymore.  Miss a deadline, who cares?  I still have the shot.  It's still in my collection.  Who cares about a bunch of international photographic judges anyway?....Yeah.  Not me, that's for sure.  Totally.....But, come on!!  I missed it by two days!!  Just two, measly little days.  Put it in the pool already!

Please?....

Well, to hell with them....

And I'm done.

Love,

L.