Judgement Day

I've had a lot of conversations over the last week about judgment. Being judged. Feeling judged. Using your best judgment. That was always the rule when I worked at Nordstrom. They printed it in every handbook. They talked about it at every training. Aside from the whole customer service thing, it was their mantra. Just use your best judgment. And I always tried, but sometimes my best judgment didn't get me to the place that I wanted to be. Did that mean the place that I wanted to be was wrong? Was what I wanted to do not the best? Who decided that? Somebody older? Somebody wiser, with a bigger office and a bigger paycheck than I had? Perhaps somebody with more at stake. And what's the difference between good judgment, better judgment and best judgment? What is the line between them? Is there a point when a good decision becomes a better decision? If that's possible, then wouldn't the opposite also be possible? Couldn't the best decision turn into a good one and then on into a bad one? How do I know I'm going the right way? I use what I know to make my decisions. All of my experience and education comes in to play when I'm weighing the options. But, what if what I know isn't enough? How do I know that my best decision wouldn't be considered by someone else to be a bad choice? How do you know if your best judgment is wrong?

I took a series of photographs recently of a woman that I know very well. They were intimate images of a beautiful time in her life. I was proud of them. She was proud of them. They were delicate and artistic. A true celebration of her experience. Exactly what we both had wanted them to be. I posted them for everyone to see, and people loved them. "She's beautiful." "She's glowing." "They're amazing." And then someone said, "Wow. That's pretty risque. You might not like having that up there." And someone else said, "Did you know there's a naked picture of her on the internet?" All of the sudden, my judgment in showing them off was called into question, if by no one other than myself. Are you sure you want to do that? Is that really the best thing? I don't know. I thought so. Had I been wrong? It was beautiful. It was tasteful. It was artistic. Those are good things. Those are the best things. Those things aren't wrong. Why do you think they're wrong?........Because every action is subjective. Everything we do has two sides. And every person we know has an opinion about it. Whether we ask for it or not, judgment exists. Both ours and that of others. If we use our experience to make a judgment call, good, better or otherwise, then can we not assume that everyone else does the same? If our choices are truly our own, if our opinions are based out of our knowledge, is it fair to say that someone else doing the same thing is wrong? My experience as a photographer tells me that it's beautiful. Your experience as an administrator tells you that it's objectionable. Who's right? How do we decide?

We can't. That's the point. You have to do what you think is right. Not because someone else's experience tells you that is, but because yours tells you that it is. And sometimes listening to their experience is enough to make you more aware of yourself. More aware of your choice. Sometimes it's not. Good judgment, better judgment, best judgment. It's all subjective. It's all up for scrutiny. And, it all comes from the same place. What that place is is entirely up to you. Hopefully, it's a place that allows you to learn from what you've done. To open yourself up to the wisdom of awareness. To do better because you know better. Because, if it truly comes from that place, it will never be wrong.