It's his own fault. He's the one who bought me the first camera and the lenses to go with it.
So, really...he only has himself to thank....
Tradition #1: The Lights
HIM:
What are you doing? I thought you were going to help me.
ME:
(On the ground, under the ladder)
I'm right here. I'm helping. Okay...that's good....Wait. Stop. Don't move. Great. Now, just a pull them up a bit...
HIM:
You know, it would be a lot more helpful if you actually held the string instead of just photographed it.
*End Scene*
Tradition #2: Christmas Blend
He was.
When I got up Saturday morning, I raced for the coffee pot and started brewing. I could hardly wait for it to finish and was tempted to pull the pot out mid-drip and pour myself a cup.
I'm impatient like that.
But, in the spirit of Christmas and that delicious first cup, I decided not to rush into anything and savor every glorious Christmas Blend moment of perfect brewing.
I pulled out my Christmas mug, poured a cup, added in the cream and slowly took a sip.
Aaaahhhhhh.....Not gonna' lie. I may have had a little orgasm there.
Except that my mother reads this, so forget that part....
So, he comes walking into the kitchen, pulls out his Disneyland mug and pours some for himself. And then he does this:
He takes a sip.
He looks at the coffee in the cup.
He looks at the coffee in the pot.
He looks back at the coffee in the cup.
He takes another sip.
He kinda' scrunches up his face and says, "Is this the Christmas Blend?"
"Yes!" Big, orgamsic smile.
"I mean, you actually put the Christmas Blend in the coffee pot this morning?"
"What?" Eyes narrow.
"It tastes like the regular coffee we always have."
"Give it to me." Snatch the cup out of his hand.
"Wha...What are you doing?"
"I'm not wasting it on you."
"Come on. Give me the coffee."
"No. If you think this tastes like the regular stuff you get from Costco, forget it. It's too important to me. It's like why I don't eat lobster."
"You don't eat lobster because it grosses you out. And the coffee from Costco costs $16 for a four pound bag. This was $10 for 10 ounces. That's $1 an ounce. $16 for a pound. That's four times the price and it tastes exactly the same."
"It does not taste the same. It's rich and spicy and bold and aromatic and full of Christmas gold....and Smarty-Man math first thing in the morning is really not attractive on you."
"Whatever. I'm making a Bloody Mary."
Tradition #3: Candy Cane Martini
"Look at that! That's a beautiful thing! I should make that my Traditions picture this week."
"Yep. Looks good."
"Yeah...except that I already used that picture of you with the lights."
"And you can't change it?"
"Well, yeah, I could. But, I like that picture of you with the lights."
"And you think that's a better picture? You think that's a feature-worthy shot?"
"Wha...I don't know. I like it. It tells a story. There's a guy. Holding up lights as they're going on the house. You can't really see his face, but you can tell what he's doing. It's a story. I like it. What is this? This is just a glass. You think this looks better?
"I think it looks like you getting drunk."
"I'm writing that you said that on my blog. I'm going to have a lot to write about you after this weekend."
"Like what?"
"The lights thing....The coffee thing....This...."
"So...three things. A lot becomes three."
He actually held up three fingers to emphasize the point. Whatever.....
Traditional Prince-y Punk.
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